I love grammar. I love being able to pick a sentence apart and put it back in a different order, find out all the different ways I can say the same thing. Language is so fluid—it’s gorgeous, really. I was the English major who took grammar classes for fun (yes, they were NOT required and I took them anyway.) and in my spare time I like to read one of my most prized possessions: the Oxford English Dictionary. (Cue angelic voices singing.) I love grammar so much that I’m planning on being an editor and spending the rest of my days contemplating dangling participles, restricted clauses, count vs. non-count nouns, etc. (Did you know that grammar is much more than just punctuation?)
But there is something that I will never, ever, ever do. And that is: I will never wield the Grammar Hammer.
The Grammar Hammer is the weapon which…
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